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Photo Friday

Friday, January 27th, 2023 "Not what we have but what we enjoy constitutes our abundance." ~ Jean Antoine Petit-Senn "Fran." "Yes, dear." "You know we haven't had any snow this season, right?" "Yes, dear." "And you know our lunatic neighbor is on house arrest, right?" "Yes, dear." "Fran, that's his truck." (Dun Dun Dun...) Ordering... Continue Reading →

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sil·hou·ette

Oi! Why is thee window sill o wet? I see you and your ankles, not just your outline behind thee whisper-white curtains. (walking away) I should have pretended I didn't see 'em. Oi. I should have paid more attention to 'em when he were younger. I blame me-self. "If you don't have any shadows, you're... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, January 20th, 2022 "A friend of mine once sent me a postcard with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back, it said, 'Wish you were here.'" ~ Steven Wright I wash everything, especially my electronics. I throw them in the spin cycle, then hang them out to dry.... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, January 13th, 2023 "The hotel I'm staying in has no 13th floor 'cause of superstition. But people on the 14th floor, you know what floor you're really on. What room are you in… 1401? No, you're not! If you jump out that window, you will die earlier." ~ Mitch Hedberg When life hands you... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, January 6th, 2023 “It sounds so simple, but if you just be yourself, you’re different than anyone else." ~ Tony Bennett "Show me the sign, and you can enter." (Flying frog with a stye.) Julie. Run. "Yes, yes, Kim... pull them up higher. It looks cool, yeah, higher," said Kim's shadow nerd. "Well, hello... Continue Reading →

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a·lone

A loan? Sure. I'll grant you this advance. Just one solitary request, you give me your arms. The strap-ons... "What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely being alone can be." ~ Ellen Burstyn Thoughts, Tuesday, January 3rd, 2023 ~ Strap-on Muscular Arms (Infomercial) For women and men: a self-protection device to deter predators.... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, December 30th, 2022 "Never regret anything that made you smile." ~ Mark Twain I'm reading your future; your tea steam patterns show... a snail and a gecko. Does this mean anything to you? "Hey, remember when I said, "The sausages look done"...?That was about 20 minutes ago. Rudolph, tired of spotting Santa all afternoon,... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, December 23rd, 2022 “Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.” ~ Hamilton Wright Mabie "A snowstorm's brewin' and Santa needs our help? Pick me, pick me!" "Um... did you say for his fireplace?" "Pick him, pick him!!" "Ok, you try drinking coffee with a beak." "Anyone seen... Continue Reading →

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sev·en·ty

Seven tea flavors for your birthday cake, dad! We thought you'd love a peppermint, fennel, dandelion, hibiscus, rooibos, earl grey, and orange peel desert to celebrate turning 70. Yay! What a festive month this is, the holidays, sure, and you turning 70 and celebrating your 50th anniversary with mom. I guess you got married when... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, December 16th, 2022 “Miracles are like pimples because once you start looking for them, you find more than you ever dreamed you'd see.” ~ Lemony Snicket, The Lump of Coal Santa's wondering why the mailbox is STILL empty... The North Pole has yet to receive one letter. What in the world is going on?!Santa... Continue Reading →

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puis·​sant

(PWIS-ənt) "I got you a wittle pwesent, you wascally wabbit." Seconds later, Elmer Fudd explodes into bits by a powerful stick of dynamite. Scene - from every Bugs Bunny episode. "You know what's driving *me* crazy? You, not getting the ball in the hole." ~ Bob Barker, Happy Gilmore Thoughts, Tuesday, December 13th, 2022 Bob... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, December 9th, 2022 "The heart that loves is always young." ~ Greek Proverb 50 years ago today, my Grandpa Considine told my dad on his wedding day,"Remember, son, marriage is a sentence, not a word."My dad’s still serving time.Happy 50th Wedding Anniversary, Mom and Dad!♥️ "I must have slipped on something." Santa did some... Continue Reading →

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ex·tinct

His ex stink'd. In all fairness, she is a fishmonger. She sells fishtails and smells like farts from whales. It's not that bad if your sense of smell is dead and gone forever. “As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, December 2nd, 2022 "Follow your inner moonlight; don’t hide the madness." ~ Allen Ginsberg "Bob's going to be mad at you, girl." "I need this vacation, Verne. I just can't listen to Bob go on and on right now. And that toothpick in his mouth... I just want to push it in. Please, just... Continue Reading →

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dis·card

"Hey, Rico! You want dis card or not? Eh? I'm a-tellin' you, dis card is da best card for shoppin', dinin', laser tag, etc., and dat card you gots right der, you can just trow it away."  "Laughter is timeless, imagination has no age, and dreams are forever." ~ Walt Disney Thoughts, Tuesday, November 29th,... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, November 25th, 2022 “Thank you, the day after Thanksgiving, or as the makers of sweatpants call it, 'the busy season.'" ~ Jimmy Fallon "Excuse me, lad, what day is it? It's the day after Thanksgiving?They did it! The Spirits did it all in one long day. I don't know what to do. I'm as... Continue Reading →

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the·o·ry

There he is! What's that? Oh, it's just something he does, hiding from me fortnightly. Yep... every two weeks he's blending in with the furniture, camouflaging himself out back or masked inside somewhere he ought not to be. Why? It's his idea, thinking it will bring us closer together. Do I enjoy it? Nope, on... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, November 18th, 2022 “Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants.” ~ Kevin James "I'm having the best month of my life! Everyone's feeding me, stuffing me, keeping me free from the dogs... I don't know what's going on, and you know what? I don't want to know. I'm done questioning things.... Continue Reading →

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mul·ti·tude

Malt it, dude! There are a large number of us out here, man, and we all want malted shakes! Ok? What do you mean this isn't a Malt Shop? What do you mean this isn't 1950? What do you mean this is a proctologist's office? So... no malt? “An opening line should invite the reader... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, November 11th, 2022 “Freedom lies in being bold.” ~ Robert Frost Highly evolved, but unable to take selfies... the Avatars decided not to show friends their vacation photos - they'd just describe them instead. "No one ever mentions my dancing." "Irish step dancing was a little challenging, tripped often, but... when I pulled it... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, November 4th, 2022 “There will be days you don’t think you can run a marathon. There will be a lifetime of knowing you have.” ~ Unknown “I hardly recognize myself after all this training.” “Dang it! I forgot my sunglasses...” “I’ll just be a minute.” Oh, that reminds me, your sister called. Biore strips,... Continue Reading →

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stal·wart

Stall, wart, grow no more! Thine eyes, no wait, my eyes! And to that hardworking hair growing out of you, wart, I curse every bit of it! You've been burned time and again - reliable as ever you return. Do not expand, invade, or grow offspring. Just stall, wart, stall! Thank you, thank you. Ode... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, October 28th, 2022 “On Halloween, parents sent their kids out looking like me.” ~ Rodney Dangerfield Pugsley's birthday party is tonight. Remember, he's vegan now. Come dressed as your favorite superhero... OR DON'T COME AT ALL. But please let us know either way. "Hey, I'll be there." "Don't zoom in too much! I'm not... Continue Reading →

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a·swarm

Is your ass warm? Mine is! I've got pockets overflowing with roasted, toasted, chewy chestnuts. (Reaching in...) It’s crowded down there; everything's moving around as I walk. Oh my gosh, where're my manners? Want one? “Do anything, but let it produce joy.” ~ Walt Whitman Thoughts, Tuesday, October 25th, 2022 You have never let me... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, October 21st, 2022 "How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!" ~ Dad Joke, use with caution "Oh, I make my own toothpaste from scratch. Au natural. My teeth are dangling and falling off, but that's a typical initial reaction." (Feature Film) SPIDERMAN XXIIITHE FINAL METAMORPHOSIS ... "IT'S REALLY ME. ASK... Continue Reading →

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re·pose

Reap, hose, then reap again. It's Fall - reap until you sleep, reap only what you want to keep, and hose away anything gross, especially if it gets too close. Why are you relaxing? Get reapin'! "The new dawn blooms as we free it. For there is always light. If only we’re brave enough to... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, October 14th, 2022 "People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing." ~ Dale Carnegie Sir Charles, Atlantic Giant, the 1st, is the last known pumpkin to be knighted by the Queen. He's been a real prick ever since. Everyone said it couldn't be done. But I did it. I grew... Continue Reading →

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snick·er·snee

"Snickers' knee?" "Most certainly. You have a textbook case of what we doctors call 'Snickers' knee'. You see, the constant bumping into, bashing about with, and falling onto - your knees - has given them that uneven nutty look. Couple that with suntanning in a bent knee position, which has darkened the outside layers into... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

"October is crisp days and cool nights, a time to curl up around the dancing flames and sink into a good book." ~ John Sinor Friday, October 7th, 2022 It’s a good thing I have my library card because I am totally checking you out. What's a gourd like you doing in a place like... Continue Reading →

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rev·​er·​en·​tial·ly

The Reverend Chili Cook-Off is about to begin! You've seen them at church, they're a part of your clergy, and now you can taste your eminence's beans and get a whiff of all that essence! It's chili you can respect, but will it honor your large intestines? Let's find out!! “Chili represents your three stages... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 30th, 2022 "I'll pick and pay, but I really want to weed whack.” ~ Kim Considine I can't believe that he shared this with me. Robert loves carbs. Outside his bedroom door. What Robert doesn't know is that we've switched to Keto bread. Yeah, I'd recognize him anywhere. That's definitely him, dead center... Continue Reading →

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de·i·ty

De ity bity spider crawled up the ... what? It's itsy bitsy? Ok, your highness. Now, follow my fingers, supreme being, follow my fingers up the water spout. De itsy bitsy spider ... “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” ~ George Bernard Shaw Thoughts, Tuesday, September 27th, 2022 ~ Race Bibs... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 23rd, 2022 "Our manager shouted, 'Keith! Ron! The Police are here!' Oh, man, we panicked, flushed everything down the john. Then the door opened, and it was Stewart Copeland and Sting." ~ Keith Richards From the inside: "Keep poking!!" I made a pact when I opened my place, and to this day, every... Continue Reading →

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es·chew

A shoo! Bless me, oh heavens. I've been deliberately abstaining from yellow raisins because they make me sneeze. But sometimes I tempt fate and a, a... a shoo! Ah. Put me in a sneezing contest, feed me just one yellow raisin, and I'm a shoo-in for winning. “Never underestimate the power of a shoe.” ~... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 16th, 2022 "If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint,' then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced." ~ Vincent Van Gogh Am I a good candidate for contacts? I brought my twin brother and Uncle Ron, I hope that's ok. Oh no! Not the red mark!!!... Continue Reading →

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pre·sen·ti·ment

What's this... a present, a mint? What the? Intuition tells me Steve put this on my desk. Like he has room to talk - every day when he walks in... whew. He may have applied his roll-on but somewhere between home and office, it rolled off. Wait, maybe I left the mint on my desk... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 9th, 2022 “Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.” ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald "Hey, have you heard anything from Dunkin'?" Some people accidentally blink in photos. I look the other way. I iron everything all at once. Game changer. Take the Blue Ridge where my mother was shot?... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 2nd, 2022 “Because in the end, you won’t remember the time you spent working in the office or mowing your lawn. Climb that goddamn mountain.” ~ Jack Kerouac I did. And who got us lost on that mountain(top) for over 3 hours, off the grid - no sign of human life? Yes! An... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, August 19th, 2022 "A good friend is a connection to life - a tie to the past, a road to the future." ~ Lois Wyse My friend Rick asked me this question the other day. Call Dr. Venkman... we've got one! He just found out he's soon to be gnomeless. He just found out he... Continue Reading →

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as·suage

I'll have an ... a sauge. One sauge, please. Sausage?? No, just regular. That should satisfy. Thank you! "It is wonderful how words generate ideas!" ~ Anne Sullivan (Helen Keller’s teacher) Thoughts, Tuesday, August 16th, 2022 To the person who told me that Nope wasn't scary... 😡 Nope... Did I make it through the whole... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, August 12th, 2022 "You might be a redneck if… Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy-size bottle of ketchup." ~ Jeff Foxworthy Just wait... Don't shake... yippee! Terry had a little TP, a little TP, a little TP.It followed him to work one day, work one day, work one day...... Continue Reading →

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va·ca·tion

Vey, Kay... Shun! I am shunning you, George! ... Oh, sorry dear, vis your Svedish grandmother calling. Ve're on holiday in Gran Chaco of South America for an extended period of leisure and recreation... primarily for your grandfather, dear. George! Leave the pollyvogs alone! Oh dear, he's yanking on their temporary tails. Gotta split. All... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, August 5th, 2022 "The month of August had turned into a griddle where the days just lay there and sizzled." ~ Sue Monk Kidd I told him to come inside. It's August. 🙄 Ok, Steve's on ice. Who's on cups and bevs? I washed my sunglasses with the laundry this week.Surprisingly, no harm was... Continue Reading →

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ce·ru·le·an

{səˈro͞olēən} So, Rue ~ Leann, Leann ~ Rue. So glad you two are finally meeting. All these years, your paths have never crossed, no matter how many times I've invited you two to my parties. How odd you both arrived today wearing the same dress and in the same hue ~ a deep sky-blue. I'll... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, July 29th,2022 “As I looked out into the night sky, across all those infinite stars, it made me realize how insignificant they are.” ~ Peter Cook The story of Rick... (You'll see this plant again soon.) Rick had never gone windsurfing before, not a day in his life.But he set sail with his goal... Continue Reading →

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come·up·pance

Come up, pants! Oh great, oh great! Look at that... just look. The bottom of my pant legs are all soiled. I knew I shouldn't have pointed and laughed at that guy back there when he fell in the puddle. Now I have to walk around waterlogged as punishment. Well, that's just great. That laugh... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, July 22, 2022 "Things are seldom what they seem." ~ W. S. Gilbert "The invisible staff meeting is about to begin. Please adjust your invisible mics." "Hey, y'all! No! No, I'm not at the pub. I sensed that eyebrow raise, Geraldine. I won't stand it!Alright, who's taking notes this week?" "I did it last... Continue Reading →

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in·tend·ed

{in'-ten-dəd} In ten, dad!! Jeesh. Ok, I'm ready. Oh, wait, what is this? I thought we were heading out for ice cream. If you planned or meant for this to be exciting, you miscalculated in judgment. You omitted to inform me that this would be another one of your cleaning tutorials. I deliberately pass on... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, July 15th, 2022 "To have courage for whatever comes in life — everything lies in that." ~ Teresa of Ávila Picnic Here. Pick Apples Here. How does one know when it's time to pick apples, I simply questioned.(Photo was taken by Keith Considine. Bear was stuffed, not hungry.) Sign created by Fido. Community Garden... Continue Reading →

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