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Photo Friday

Friday, November 25th, 2022 “Thank you, the day after Thanksgiving, or as the makers of sweatpants call it, 'the busy season.'" ~ Jimmy Fallon "Excuse me, lad, what day is it? It's the day after Thanksgiving?They did it! The Spirits did it all in one long day. I don't know what to do. I'm as... Continue Reading →

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the·o·ry

There he is! What's that? Oh, it's just something he does, hiding from me fortnightly. Yep... every two weeks he's blending in with the furniture, camouflaging himself out back or masked inside somewhere he ought not to be. Why? It's his idea, thinking it will bring us closer together. Do I enjoy it? Nope, on... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, November 18th, 2022 “Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants.” ~ Kevin James "I'm having the best month of my life! Everyone's feeding me, stuffing me, keeping me free from the dogs... I don't know what's going on, and you know what? I don't want to know. I'm done questioning things.... Continue Reading →

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mul·ti·tude

Malt it, dude! There are a large number of us out here, man, and we all want malted shakes! Ok? What do you mean this isn't a Malt Shop? What do you mean this isn't 1950? What do you mean this is a proctologist's office? So... no malt? “An opening line should invite the reader... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, November 11th, 2022 “Freedom lies in being bold.” ~ Robert Frost Highly evolved, but unable to take selfies... the Avatars decided not to show friends their vacation photos - they'd just describe them instead. "No one ever mentions my dancing." "Irish step dancing was a little challenging, tripped often, but... when I pulled it... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, November 4th, 2022 “There will be days you don’t think you can run a marathon. There will be a lifetime of knowing you have.” ~ Unknown “I hardly recognize myself after all this training.” “Dang it! I forgot my sunglasses...” “I’ll just be a minute.” Oh, that reminds me, your sister called. Biore strips,... Continue Reading →

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stal·wart

Stall, wart, grow no more! Thine eyes, no wait, my eyes! And to that hardworking hair growing out of you, wart, I curse every bit of it! You've been burned time and again - reliable as ever you return. Do not expand, invade, or grow offspring. Just stall, wart, stall! Thank you, thank you. Ode... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, October 28th, 2022 “On Halloween, parents sent their kids out looking like me.” ~ Rodney Dangerfield Pugsley's birthday party is tonight. Remember, he's vegan now. Come dressed as your favorite superhero... OR DON'T COME AT ALL. But please let us know either way. "Hey, I'll be there." "Don't zoom in too much! I'm not... Continue Reading →

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a·swarm

Is your ass warm? Mine is! I've got pockets overflowing with roasted, toasted, chewy chestnuts. (Reaching in...) It’s crowded down there; everything's moving around as I walk. Oh my gosh, where're my manners? Want one? “Do anything, but let it produce joy.” ~ Walt Whitman Thoughts, Tuesday, October 25th, 2022 You have never let me... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, October 21st, 2022 "How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!" ~ Dad Joke, use with caution "Oh, I make my own toothpaste from scratch. Au natural. My teeth are dangling and falling off, but that's a typical initial reaction." (Feature Film) SPIDERMAN XXIIITHE FINAL METAMORPHOSIS ... "IT'S REALLY ME. ASK... Continue Reading →

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re·pose

Reap, hose, then reap again. It's Fall - reap until you sleep, reap only what you want to keep, and hose away anything gross, especially if it gets too close. Why are you relaxing? Get reapin'! "The new dawn blooms as we free it. For there is always light. If only we’re brave enough to... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, October 14th, 2022 "People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing." ~ Dale Carnegie Sir Charles, Atlantic Giant, the 1st, is the last known pumpkin to be knighted by the Queen. He's been a real prick ever since. Everyone said it couldn't be done. But I did it. I grew... Continue Reading →

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snick·er·snee

"Snickers' knee?" "Most certainly. You have a textbook case of what we doctors call 'Snickers' knee'. You see, the constant bumping into, bashing about with, and falling onto - your knees - has given them that uneven nutty look. Couple that with suntanning in a bent knee position, which has darkened the outside layers into... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

"October is crisp days and cool nights, a time to curl up around the dancing flames and sink into a good book." ~ John Sinor Friday, October 7th, 2022 It’s a good thing I have my library card because I am totally checking you out. What's a gourd like you doing in a place like... Continue Reading →

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rev·​er·​en·​tial·ly

The Reverend Chili Cook-Off is about to begin! You've seen them at church, they're a part of your clergy, and now you can taste your eminence's beans and get a whiff of all that essence! It's chili you can respect, but will it honor your large intestines? Let's find out!! “Chili represents your three stages... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 30th, 2022 "I'll pick and pay, but I really want to weed whack.” ~ Kim Considine I can't believe that he shared this with me. Robert loves carbs. Outside his bedroom door. What Robert doesn't know is that we've switched to Keto bread. Yeah, I'd recognize him anywhere. That's definitely him, dead center... Continue Reading →

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de·i·ty

De ity bity spider crawled up the ... what? It's itsy bitsy? Ok, your highness. Now, follow my fingers, supreme being, follow my fingers up the water spout. De itsy bitsy spider ... “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” ~ George Bernard Shaw Thoughts, Tuesday, September 27th, 2022 ~ Race Bibs... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 23rd, 2022 "Our manager shouted, 'Keith! Ron! The Police are here!' Oh, man, we panicked, flushed everything down the john. Then the door opened, and it was Stewart Copeland and Sting." ~ Keith Richards From the inside: "Keep poking!!" I made a pact when I opened my place, and to this day, every... Continue Reading →

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es·chew

A shoo! Bless me, oh heavens. I've been deliberately abstaining from yellow raisins because they make me sneeze. But sometimes I tempt fate and a, a... a shoo! Ah. Put me in a sneezing contest, feed me just one yellow raisin, and I'm a shoo-in for winning. “Never underestimate the power of a shoe.” ~... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 16th, 2022 "If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint,' then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced." ~ Vincent Van Gogh Am I a good candidate for contacts? I brought my twin brother and Uncle Ron, I hope that's ok. Oh no! Not the red mark!!!... Continue Reading →

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pre·sen·ti·ment

What's this... a present, a mint? What the? Intuition tells me Steve put this on my desk. Like he has room to talk - every day when he walks in... whew. He may have applied his roll-on but somewhere between home and office, it rolled off. Wait, maybe I left the mint on my desk... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 9th, 2022 “Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.” ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald "Hey, have you heard anything from Dunkin'?" Some people accidentally blink in photos. I look the other way. I iron everything all at once. Game changer. Take the Blue Ridge where my mother was shot?... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, September 2nd, 2022 “Because in the end, you won’t remember the time you spent working in the office or mowing your lawn. Climb that goddamn mountain.” ~ Jack Kerouac I did. And who got us lost on that mountain(top) for over 3 hours, off the grid - no sign of human life? Yes! An... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, August 19th, 2022 "A good friend is a connection to life - a tie to the past, a road to the future." ~ Lois Wyse My friend Rick asked me this question the other day. Call Dr. Venkman... we've got one! He just found out he's soon to be gnomeless. He just found out he... Continue Reading →

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as·suage

I'll have an ... a sauge. One sauge, please. Sausage?? No, just regular. That should satisfy. Thank you! "It is wonderful how words generate ideas!" ~ Anne Sullivan (Helen Keller’s teacher) Thoughts, Tuesday, August 16th, 2022 To the person who told me that Nope wasn't scary... 😡 Nope... Did I make it through the whole... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, August 12th, 2022 "You might be a redneck if… Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy-size bottle of ketchup." ~ Jeff Foxworthy Just wait... Don't shake... yippee! Terry had a little TP, a little TP, a little TP.It followed him to work one day, work one day, work one day...... Continue Reading →

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va·ca·tion

Vey, Kay... Shun! I am shunning you, George! ... Oh, sorry dear, vis your Svedish grandmother calling. Ve're on holiday in Gran Chaco of South America for an extended period of leisure and recreation... primarily for your grandfather, dear. George! Leave the pollyvogs alone! Oh dear, he's yanking on their temporary tails. Gotta split. All... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, August 5th, 2022 "The month of August had turned into a griddle where the days just lay there and sizzled." ~ Sue Monk Kidd I told him to come inside. It's August. 🙄 Ok, Steve's on ice. Who's on cups and bevs? I washed my sunglasses with the laundry this week.Surprisingly, no harm was... Continue Reading →

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ce·ru·le·an

{səˈro͞olēən} So, Rue ~ Leann, Leann ~ Rue. So glad you two are finally meeting. All these years, your paths have never crossed, no matter how many times I've invited you two to my parties. How odd you both arrived today wearing the same dress and in the same hue ~ a deep sky-blue. I'll... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, July 29th,2022 “As I looked out into the night sky, across all those infinite stars, it made me realize how insignificant they are.” ~ Peter Cook The story of Rick... (You'll see this plant again soon.) Rick had never gone windsurfing before, not a day in his life.But he set sail with his goal... Continue Reading →

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come·up·pance

Come up, pants! Oh great, oh great! Look at that... just look. The bottom of my pant legs are all soiled. I knew I shouldn't have pointed and laughed at that guy back there when he fell in the puddle. Now I have to walk around waterlogged as punishment. Well, that's just great. That laugh... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, July 22, 2022 "Things are seldom what they seem." ~ W. S. Gilbert "The invisible staff meeting is about to begin. Please adjust your invisible mics." "Hey, y'all! No! No, I'm not at the pub. I sensed that eyebrow raise, Geraldine. I won't stand it!Alright, who's taking notes this week?" "I did it last... Continue Reading →

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in·tend·ed

{in'-ten-dəd} In ten, dad!! Jeesh. Ok, I'm ready. Oh, wait, what is this? I thought we were heading out for ice cream. If you planned or meant for this to be exciting, you miscalculated in judgment. You omitted to inform me that this would be another one of your cleaning tutorials. I deliberately pass on... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, July 15th, 2022 "To have courage for whatever comes in life — everything lies in that." ~ Teresa of Ávila Picnic Here. Pick Apples Here. How does one know when it's time to pick apples, I simply questioned.(Photo was taken by Keith Considine. Bear was stuffed, not hungry.) Sign created by Fido. Community Garden... Continue Reading →

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ef·fi·cient

{i-ˈfi-shənt} A fish in it? Waiter, waiter! I say, do tell me what's swimming around in my glass of water. Is the cook trying to achieve maximum productivity with minimum wasted effort or expense by combining my dinner and beverage, or is he off his rocker again? Do tell ... “Look at where Jesus went... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, July 8th, 2022 "Do something worth remembering." ~ Elvis Presley A little less conversation, a little more action, please ... All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me ... A little more bite and a little less bark ... A little less fight and a little more spark ... Close your mouth and open up your... Continue Reading →

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com·pat·i·ble

Come, Pat, a bull! A bull is behind you ... run!! Jk. It's not behind you. Yes, it is! I'm serious, run! Or stay, play dead, I don't know! But I'm gonna yell this right now, you and that bull are not capable of existing or occurring together in this pit much longer without conflict!... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, July 1st, 2022 “Never underestimate the power you have to take your life in a new direction." ~ Germany Kent Summer's here, and I'm going to use my free time wisely. I'm going to grow a real mustache. I'm following the Margaritaville Tour all summer long. I'm a Parrot Head, and I can't hide... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, June 24th, 2022 "For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love." ~ Carl Sagan, Contact, 1985 Uncle Jim won't let us go near Betty or his pet monkey, both appeared out of the blue last year. Aunt Patty, the monkey, says we can visit her and Betty when Uncle... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, June 17th, 2022 "I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it." ~ W.C. Fields In my defense, never mind.I'm just happy I spelled everything correctly. Every Tuesday & Wednesday, I feed the door compliments. But really, it's stupid. The pair second from the right! Please. God, I need... Continue Reading →

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en·ter·tain·ing

Enter tanning booth, clothes on or off, depending on your bronzing goals. Try one eye covered, one sock off, a handprint, reverse freckles ... get creative in there! I take pleasure and enjoyment in others' awkward tan lines. "People have an infinite attention span if you are entertaining them." ~ Jerry Seinfeld Thoughts, Tuesday, June... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, June 10th, 2022 The early bird may get the worm, but it's the second mouse that gets the cheese. ~ Jeremy Paxman Click it again, I think we're over there ... Nope. Click it again. Someone told Sally about my doggie diapers!! (Gasp!) ... "If we understand the worm, we understand life." ~ John... Continue Reading →

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Wednesday’s Words

Wednesday, June 8th, 2022 That is life … to begin again when everything is lost! ~A.J. Cronin Begin, Again Walking away from what isn’tUnknown, what isBut pleasantWhy waitAnother dayWhy fakeAny momentDug shallowDrowning anyhowDeepen the plungeClearing the airEach momentAn endA chanceBegin, againFelt stagnantPent upAll abruptA shred of courageFading foregroundDesire ignitedSteadier nowI’m strongI’ve been aroundStirringFar too long... Continue Reading →

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ab·squat·u·late

Ab, squat, you late again! You left abruptly last session, and show up late this session?! You're gonna sweat, let's go! Ab, squat, ab, squat, plié ... ab, squat! "I have nothing in common with lazy people who blame others for their lack of success. Great things come from hard work and perseverance. No excuses."... Continue Reading →

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Photo Friday

Friday, June 3rd, 2022 "To have become a deeper man is the privilege of those who have suffered." ~ Oscar Wilde We've recently relocated ... No, no! Come back! It's not creepy. Disregard the entrance and when I told you to lock all of the locks and all of the bolts behind you ... come... Continue Reading →

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pho·to

[ foh-toh ] He had Pho toe! I'm telling you. His foot smelled exactly like Wagyu Beef Pho! I had some recently and that's exactly what his toe and the rest of his foot smelled like. He took that sock off, and I'll be ... it smelt exactly like my dinner a few months back. If... Continue Reading →

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ig·no·rant

Ignore Aunt Bethany! She didn't mean it when she said that you're stupid. It was a bit insensible of her, sure. However, she is rude, impolite, and ill-mannered. "It's not about who is real to your face, it's about who stays real behind your back." ~ Unknown Thoughts, Tuesday, May 24th, 2022 ~ Absurdity ...... Continue Reading →

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